Tag Archives: britney

Top Squirrels Ever – No. 1

Some photos become iconic and adorn the walls of student campuses the world over – the Nirvana baby, the Reservoir Dogs standoff, and the ones of Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears getting out of taxis with no knickers.

And now this (which is on our fridge, at least*) – a squirrel bloody team shot!!!

The A-Team

AND WHAT A TEAM! Back left is BA – hard, surly, just going about his business pitying fools. Face is at front flirting, using his tail to be as sexy as is squirrely possible.

Murdoch is back right and has positioned his tail to make it look like he has gigantic testicles. And back middle is Hannibal, who loves it so much when a squirrel team shot comes together he’s put his arm round his good buddy Murdock.

All these squirrels kinda make a collective Number 1, but Hannibal is the out and out winner cause he seems to love being in a photo as much as we love looking at it.

* = and probably most

John and Edward rock the mic!!

“There are two certainties in life: Death and Taxes!”  -  so said God on one of his ill received mid-80 ‘s BC electro albums.

Well, big guy, you can add “John and Edward” rocking the microphone to that list of certainties and take off taxes – celebrity hypocrite fuckbag Bono managed to get out of them pretty easily by moving U2’s entire song catalogue from Ireland to Amsterdam. Wanker.

Anyway, I digress, the saying should now read “There are two certainties in life: Death, and “John and Edward” rocking the microphone.”

And how? On Saturday they stepped it up again. Virtually no girls, let alone lads, would have braved singing that Britney song, in those Britney outfits, with that arm-linking dance-routine and then looking into each others eyes as they did the talky bit about the old bint from the end of Titanic. But “John and Edward” did and even added a gay-incestuous-twin-vibe to proceedings – perhaps the rarest of all the vibes.

Of course, vocally they weren’t very good. They weren’t even good. Or average. Or even poor. They were fucking awful but that’s what rocking the microphone is all about – being as far away from mediocre as possible and “John and Edward” are infinity away. That’s how awesome/awful they are.

Who knows how they’re gonna top this? Hopefully at some point in the competition they’ll both cross-dress as school girls and try a gay-incestuous-twin-vibe version of the Britney-Madonna lesbian kiss.

And what about poor ol’ Whitney Houston’s performance? Well, she should get back to her crack addiction. John and Edward are where it’s at!